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Well actually he wants to be a musician, but its not such a good headline.

He has the looks, he has the attitude and he can sing and play the guitar, he has talent

(I admit that there are many stars who have no talent but I think it should be a prerequisite). He says he’s made up his mind to be a musician, when he makes up his mind to do something, he usually succeeds.

Of course I would think he’s the bees knees, so to speak, I’m his mother; but that aside, he really does have talent and the desire. He taught himself to play the guitar, I think his dad showed him the basics but after that, he worked it out. He had his first guitar lesson when he went to secondary school, the teacher told me he found it hard to believe that my son had got that far by himself, declaring him a truly gifted, natural player. I love to watch his fingers when he’s playing, the way they move, elegant, so sure, so smooth.

I know he can do it, though following dreams is often hard work, and I doubt following his will be easy. Like most people he has to work, he lives independently in London and life’s not cheap there. Working means he has less time. Then, he tells me he needs a band, he cant do the sort of music he likes to play on his own (he likes a wide range of music but I think Metallica are his main source of inspiration).

When I spoke to him on the phone the other night I told him. If this is what you want, then you have to get out there and do it, it’s not going to happen if you keep your talent hidden. It’s unlikely that some one will be walking around the back streets off Archway road, hear you playing in the house and say  “I’m going to make him a star!”. I guess it’s possible but unlikely.

I’m not sure it was what he was wanting to hear, but it was all I could give him, what do I know about making it in the music industry? Nothing, but people have got to hear what he’s got.

I was recently given the same kind of advice from a friend, I was complaining of having difficulty with some ideas, she said I should stop being precious and just get on with it. She was right and I could see it, basically time to stop pussy footing about and put in the work.

The same goes for my son. I know he can do it, if its what he really wants. Anyway he promised me that when he makes it big he will get a jet plane, so we can see each other more often, I’m counting on that.

I find it much easier to help someone else pursue their dream, than to follow my own, why is that? I should think its fear of failure. Yet sometimes fearing something can be used as a spur to make you get on and face it. For me the fear of not trying, can be greater than the fear of failure. The fear of looking back and thinking, if only or what if?

I reminded him of Pink Floyds lyrics,

“And then one day you find, ten years have got behind you, no one told you when to run, you missed the starting gun.”

Start running now!

Post script.

My son tells me that although he likes Metallica, he wouldn’t say they are a main source of inspiration but Motorhead, Suicidal Tendencies and Rancid are.

Many years ago, when I was a teanager, obsessed by 50’s Rock n Roll, my brother introduced me to Motorhead, I didn’t know what to make of them at first but they grew on me. In turn I played their classic, Ace of Spades to my son and, on seeing his reaction, bought him one of their CD’s. My son went to see them a while back, said they blew him away. Can someone tell Lemmy please!

I still occaisionally like to deafen myself with Lemmy’s dulcet tones, I shall enjoy playing my son’s gift of a Rancid CD at full volume, will shock the neighbours and make a change from Forro!

©Claire Pattison Valente 2008